Hello internet friends, Zachary "Spooker Jones" Gutierrez here with another grab bag of internet horrors. This week we have teens who need help, a popular anarchist with a legion of dorks, the worst forum ever, and musical guest Hoobastank. More like HoobaSTUNK am I correct here guys?

My nose is bleeding so click here. Maybe I should just keep my finger out of there.

– Zachary "Spokker Jones" Gutierrez

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  • GLUT OF DOGS

    GLUT OF DOGS

    TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851

  • THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    THE PERFECT HUMAN FORM

    Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.

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