Moof: i do not understand how any smart individual can believe in evolution
Moof: it infuriates me
Moof: trying to tell me that a turtle evolved from a rock!!
Moof: what am i stupid??
Livestock: and yet, 9 times out of 10, turtles are mistaken for rocks
Livestock: are we to believe that it is just chance that turtles and rocks look alike??/
Moof: that is how the theory of evolution started
Moof: livestock god
Moof: just because a dog looks like a hog
Livestock: have you forgotten about darwin's finches
Moof: doesnt mean that a dog is a hog!
Livestock: each one has a different beak for hitting different musical notes
Livestock: they had to evolve so that they could do greater musical numbers
Moof: actually darwin shaped the beaks himself with a chisel
Livestock: do you have proof of this
Moof: do you have proof of evolution???
Livestock: do you know what fossil records are
Livestock: they show that turtles came from rocks
Moof: the only true science is the science of our lord jesus
Livestock: how else do skeletons get inside rocks unless rocks were at one time alive???
Moof: god put skeletons in rocks to test our faith
Moof: i don't mind though it is just more room in heaven for me!
Livestock: moof i will throw rocks at your god
Livestock: and you as well
Moof: would you teach your children that horses evolved form oats??
Moof: what a ridiculous concept
Livestock: i don't think you understand evolution, you dumb creationist
Livestock: horses did not evolve from oats they evolved from ponies
Livestock: simple organisms evolve into more complex ones
Livestock: ponies are simpler than horses
Moof: if horses evolved form ponies then what did ponies evolve from
Livestock: at one point ponies evolved from dogs
Livestock: dogs evolved from cats
Livestock: cats from rats
Livestock: rats from mice
Moof: haha then what!
Livestock: mice from hairy spiders
Moof: it all had to start somewhere!!
Livestock: yes moof the big bang
Moof: your theory is a terrible one
Moof: livestock you are so dumb
Moof: just because there is a scientific explanation with mountains of proof supporting it does not mean it is right
Moof: because it is complicated
Moof: god would make things simple not complicated
Moof: use occam's razor
Livestock: moof god made rainbows to tell people there would be no more floods
Livestock: next he'll destroy the earth with fire :)
Moof: actually he made them to tell people where gold is buried
BLACK LIVES MATTER!!! NOOOOOOO!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? YOU HAVE CREATED A MONSTER, AN ABSOLUTE MONSTER!
Something Awful is in the process of changing hands to a new owner. In the meantime we're pausing all updates and halting production on our propaganda comic partnership with Northrop Grumman.
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Play your entire PS1 library from a single SD card. But not your Brady Strategy Guides.
Moof and Livestock discuss life, love, human nature, and all the most important issues affecting humanity.