Space Station Tik Tok, The Moon Unit, submitted by Satan. Cat owners have a way of scaring the hell out of me. Some of them act and present themselves as sane people, but others are just completely criminally insane. I fear for the day when these creepshows try to take over a city with an army of highly trained feline fighters and dictate their sappy demands to us. In fact, I'm all for just launching cats into outer space as a preventative measure. Surprisingly, a brave crew of delusional sassbuckets has already come to a similar conclusion. This space-themed site has something to do with a lot of dead cats and outer space. I think it's more to do with dead cats, though.
One of the brightest stars in the catkingdom,Queen Bitsy, has crossed over the Rainbow Bridge.She will be so missed by all of us here at the Space Station.
Some of these dead cat memorials are accompanied by sterile, lifeless pages of mourning where human enslavers express something akin to regret over the passing of their feline pet creatures. It's like there is some strange undercurrent of icy detachment through an emotionally vapid futuristic space fantasy world. There is an awful lot of creepy talk about "rainbow bridges" and Earth's retarded little buddy, the Moon. I wish whatever it is that possesses people to make pages like this would also possess them to jump off a rainbow bridge without a happy thoughts parachute. As vast and totally cool as it is, I fear that these cat people may even one day ruin outer space. I leave you with one final warning:
IN SPACE NO ONE CAN HEAR YOU MEOW!
Editor's Note: Due to a freak power outage, this obituary of Barbara Bush was written without the benefit of research. In order to pay our respects to this great woman in a timely fashion, we have decided to post this piece as-is. We hope you forgive any errors on our part.
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