THE SEVEN HEALING RAYS, submitted by Dan. AHAHAHAHAH HAHAHA AHHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHaha ahahahhahahaha

In the year of the harmonic convergence, 1987, the masters of the seven rays spoke through Grayson in seven recorded channeling sessions. They disclosed for the first time the powerful cosmic discipline of using the rays to heal different conditions and transforming disorder into perfect health. In these sessions, the masters taught the functions of the seven rays and their proper application, and initiated the fourteen individuals present as healers capable of using the technique.

Experiencing the Seven Rays workshop for a second time was more powerful than the first. Words are too inadequate to describe the tremendous feeling of Divine Healing Power flowing through me. Thank God for this experience.

The seven rays initiates are masters over their own life and destiny. In this new millennium of healing miracles, the layman and health professional alike are equally empowered with the seven rays to achieve the same wonderful results -- perfect health and rejuvenation. All persons can help themselves and their loved ones, and practitioners can work with greater skill and efficiency in their chosen fields.

AHAHAHHAHAHAH AHAHAH AAHAHHAHAHAHA Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahhaha ahhahahahahah

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fandangling Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    'We’re going to be in trouble!' Little Sister wailed, clutching her favorite book to her chest and sobbing. 'This isn’t fun like a story anymore!' But Big Sister was not listening, she was thinking. She grabbed Little Sister’s book from her and ran into town, yelling 'Help! A book made me and my sister hurt someone!'

  • Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    Enter: the Lead Loremaster

    I've been wanting to meet you all for the past few weeks, but I guess I cut an intimidating figure. I'm the new guy, with the cool job you've all surely been gossiping about. Yep, I'm the Lead Loremaster, and I'm here to enrich everything we do with much-needed lore.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.