Carstuckgirls, submitted by Mirkane. As an internet celebrity/god, I am exposed to all manners of bizarre, exotic, and pointless fetishes. And although I'm sure something will come along to make me eat my words, I nonetheless say with confidence that this site is dedicated to the single dumbest fetish in the world. It's an entire extensive website devoted to the apparently erotic concept of women getting their cars stuck and trying to get them out again, especially by pumping the pedals. Carstuckgirls caters to every possible desire of the four followers of this fetish, including different makes and models of cars, jeeps, and sports utility vehicles, as well as girls pumping the gas with all sorts of footwear, including high heels, stockings, and even barefoot! It's a veritable cornucopia of the most bizarrely unerotic "porn" I've ever seen. I mean, I understand that a lot of people who subscribe to these strange fetishes in which nothing sexual actually happens probably come from very repressed upbringing where sexuality was demonized, so now they express their sexuality through some sort of obscured channel. At least, that's one plausible psychoanalysis of it. Another explanation is that these people are fucking insane. But I can't even begin to comprehend how repressed a person would have to be as a child to find this crap erotic. Let alone erotic enough to merit the production of DVDs.
Here's a sobering thought: someone, somewhere, is masturbating to that picture. Right now.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.