Dancing Dogs, submitted by Meckle. This just in: Osama bin Laden is a bad man! News at 11.
Thank you for tuning in to the Eleven O' Clock News. I'm your anchorman, Skip Savage. Tonight's top story, a website has uncovered a shocking fact about infamous super-terrorist Osama bin Laden - he may not, in fact, be a nice guy with America's interests at heart. This shocking news is presented on the site in question in a variety of informative, intellectual, and thought-provoking ways, including a stupid animation of bin Laden's head morphing into a skull, and a cheapass game in which you can shoot bin Laden's head, hoping to turn it into a skull. This kind of cutting edge technology is redefining what it means to have a website.
Other webmasters seeking to convey a thoroughly obvious message that would never in a million years require the tiniest fraction of time, effort, or money that it takes to maintain a shitty website have much to learn from this phenomenal use of server space. From the annoying, slow-loading GIFs that mark every page to the crappy music files that can't be disabled, there's something for everyone to enjoy as they reel from the overwhelming knowledge that Osama bin Laden is not as neat a guy as previously thought. There's even a guestbook page featuring an X-Files theme midi for some reason. It's all the best browser-crashing internet irritations you could ask for, rolled up into one convenient package. Thanks, humanity!
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.