Sure, your favorite cartoon characters may collectively come of as jovial, well-adjusted creatures who likely haven't a worry in their multi-hued heads. But come on — are you so naïve as to think they don't have pressing, important issues to deal with, just like us humans? If so, then maybe this week's Comedy Goldmine will open your eyes to the crazy, often depressing lifestyles these lovable outlines can lead.
Forums Goon SailorBob gets us started with one of the most widely responded to MSPaint threads on the forums in years, thus necessitating this Goldmine be broken into two parts.
At least SailorBob's Calvin still has his imagination.
Old Man Withers shows us what a more likely lonely foster child's life is like.
It's definitely a black and white issue for Matt Cruea.
beeaar reminds us just how fearless our favorite Italian plumber really is.
Given our society's obsession with stalking and ridiculing celebrities, it's tempting to seek a life of anonymity. But beware: not being famous has its own hidden costs.
Mass Effect: Andromeda turns its nose up at the original trilogy's rigid morality. It boasts a more nuanced and intellectually compelling shades-of-grey approach in which a heart icon pops up when it's time to tell an alien to take their clothes off.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.