Sure, your favorite cartoon characters may collectively come of as jovial, well-adjusted creatures who likely haven't a worry in their multi-hued heads. But come on — are you so naïve as to think they don't have pressing, important issues to deal with, just like us humans? If so, then maybe this week's Comedy Goldmine will open your eyes to the crazy, often depressing lifestyles these lovable outlines can lead.



Forums Goon SailorBob gets us started with one of the most widely responded to MSPaint threads on the forums in years, thus necessitating this Goldmine be broken into two parts.


At least SailorBob's Calvin still has his imagination.

Old Man Withers shows us what a more likely lonely foster child's life is like.

It's definitely a black and white issue for Matt Cruea.

beeaar reminds us just how fearless our favorite Italian plumber really is.

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