Make Gold Teeth, submitted by Stabby McDamage. Stop! I have some important buisness news that will blow your socks off and your teeth off! But it won't hurt because your teeth are made of SOLID GOLD. Yes you heard me! SOLID GOLD. How do they make teeth out of gold! No one knows at all! It must be impossible! But it's not!

Have you ever wondered how removable gold teeth are made? The actual process of making gold teeth has been a closely guarded secret for the past decade. With only a small handful of people in the entire world knowing how to make gold teeth, you can certainly understand why they've kept it a secret...it's making them millions.

Only good news! For the low low price of 4k you can be let in on the biggest secret since the secret of the pharaohs! Or whatever!

For the first time ever, there is now a 3-day course offered in Savannah, Georgia which shows you exactly how to make gold teeth. You'll learn in 3 days what has taken other jewelers years to learn. Don't have any experience making jewelry? No problem. This course has been designed to teach anyone how to make gold fronts. Plus, as an added bonus, on the last day of class you'll make your own set of 6 gold teeth.

Yes! I will learn how to do this in 3 days and get rich! Yes! See you suckers! I am gone and rich! It feels so good, I will tell you!

– Joseph "Maxnmona" Fink

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    The Fracking Fables of Groggery Gibbonman

    ‘Toad coin?’ wondered the traveler as he examined the pebble. It did not look all that different from any other pebble, and certainly nothing like a coin. ‘What manner of coin has no head or tail, and bears no seal or flag? Who backs this toad coin, the toad bank? The toad treasury!?’ The traveler laughed, but the toads croaked sternly back at him.

  • Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Your Dog is Totally Worth Refrigerated Food

    Spending $10-15 a day on perishable organic dog food is not a sign of a decadent culture in terminal decline, it's actually real good and worth it.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.