Ken Atwood's Personal Homepage (thanks Slack3r) WARNING: MAY OR MAY NOT CRASH YOUR BROWSER. IT WORKED OK ON MINE BUT OTHERS HAD DIFFERENT RESULTS.

I'm not sure what this guy's deal is because, to be honest, I didn't read any of the words on his page. But I did look at all of them. It was kinda hard not to what with them flying all over my screen.

Studies show that most people never read because "those boring words just sit still and don't jump all over the place and slam into each other and stuff." This site deftly solves that problem by having the words whiz everywhere constantly, usually overtop of other words, and you never actually have a chance to read anything because you're too busy refreshing so you can watch it happen again.

After seeing this site, I've begun talks with high-level members of SomethingAwful, and we may be seeing our website getting another redesign very soon. That's all I can say right now...

– Joseph "Maxnmona" Fink

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    The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'

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