Surely you've heard of the "world's youngest author" Gloria Tesch? At the age of 16, she's written six fantasy novels, all of which are self-published and none of which appear to be available for direct sale anywhere but at her own Web site. Yet according to a recent report by "Kyle Kendrick," purported to be the news-breaking host of Celebrity Soup (canceled in 2006), crazed Tesch fans are serving up "a hot dish of hysteria," storming what must be the only book store in the world that stocks her titles and asking for autographs "in the most precarious of places."
WHY HAVE WE BEEN BROUGHT TO THIS TOTALLY DIFFERENT WORLD???
Between shots of relatives and/or paid derelicts simulating fandom, this video features exciting recreations of scenes from The Maradonia Saga, which ostensibly serve as a preview of the inevitable motion-picture adaptations. Says submitter Schadenfraulein: "Perhaps the grimmest part of this grim video is a dramatized scene in which a cigar-chomping movie-studio exec discovers her work. Also a flying skull." No matter how terrible Tesch's work might be -- and the quoted sections suggest "very terrible" -- books are difficult to appreciate ironically, given the necessary time commitment. Fortunately, this "book trailer" provides the perfect shortcut!
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.