Private Paparazzi magazine: Your source for design tips and photos of nobodies.Bill Murray once advised people aspiring to be rich and famous to "try being rich first, see if that doesn't cover most of it.... When you become famous, you end up with a 24-hour job." That don't sound too good, Bill Murray. Perverting Murray's advice, some people have decided to try fame first, recruiting Private Paparazzi to chauffeur the test drive. This company, which asks customers to pay up to $100 an hour for its services, recreates one of the most annoying side-effects of stardom -- an omnipresent gnat swarm of clicking cameras -- without reproducing any of celebrity's more attractive perks.
With a crew of photographers documenting the sordid details of their bachelor parties and birthday pub crawls, Private Paparazzi consumers can combine their primary obsessions: Attracting attention in the most gaudy, talentless fashion possible, and ensuring every depressing debauch of their ostentatious social lives ends up in an overstuffed social networking site photo album. Instead of ambushing their targets to ensure unflattering tabloid-style images, the Private Paparazzi shutterbugs coax posed shots, then use "Celebrity Style Photo Editing," achieving the kind of image manipulation only available to the stars (or any random, Private Paparazzi client-caliber loser with Photoshop).
Who *wouldn't* pay to have these guys follow them?
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.