A Very Truly Tragic Romance (1990)
Lisa Schumacher (poem)
Joel Schumacher (screenplay)
Genre: Drama / Romance / Sobsploitation / Infantlike Handsome Men (more)
Tagline: He's dying of cancer, but she will make him want to live of cancer!
Plot Summary: Jennifer Skylar is hired as a caretaker for a wealthy man dying from cancer, but when she realizes he can't get up and can never betray her she falls madly in love with him in a vague, non-threatening romance that barely involves physical love and then only in a really non-icky way so you don't have to (more) (view trailer)
Plot Keywords: Woman with a Puppet / Hair on a Puppet / Comb a Puppet / Puppet Brushing (more)
User Comments: YO I SAW THIS SHIT FOR REAL AT THE SHOW WAY BACK WITH DARNYL AND P-POPPER AND IT DAMN NEAR MAKE A NIGGA EYE FALL UP OUT OF HIS HEAD I WAS CRYING SO (more)
User Rating: 5.5 / 10 (2,733 votes)
Cast overview, first billed only:
Geena Davis ... Jennifer Skylar
Bill Pullman ... Walter Puffin
Shelly Long ... Mona Armstrong-Puffin
Omar Sharif ... Dr. Baht Nuesef
Jeff Fahey ... Hunk Beauregard
Also Known As:
Cancer Day! (Jpn)
Die Sobbenwerken (Ger)
Film Saffron 16 (Xej)
Runtime: 126 mins / Interminable (men only)
Language: Tugged Heartstrings
Aspect Ratio: 2.35:1:100
Sound Mix: DJ Desmond "Dee" Jay of DJ & DJ's DJs
MOVIEmeter: 5 Billion since the diagnosis scene why?
Certification: UK: Queen's List / Japan: Panty Vend Only / Geena Davis: In it / Mileena Davis: Zippers up the front / Hallmark Channel: 24/7 / USA: D / Xerenej: Auburn Coda, Melt
AMDB Memorable Quotes:
Jennifer Skylar: Forget you, Hunk! I've had enough of your cheating!
(Throws some shit)
Hunk Beauregard: Come on baby, it's not how it looks. She was just helping me try on a new condom...for us...
Jennifer Skylar: There is no "us" anymore, Hunk! It's over! I'm going to go get a job babysitting some cancer homebody and there's nothing you can do to stop me!!!!
Jennifer Skylar: I'm your new nurse I'm here to help you with your cancer.
(She takes his pulse)
Walter Puffmin: Oh crap this cancer hurts a ton!
Jennifer Skylar: I know what will help you feel better...
(two gay dudes start screwing while the Jingle Dogs bark out "Silent Night")
Walter Puffin: I'm dying Jenny....
Jennifer Skylar: No you're not...you're just starting to live...
Walter Puffin: You're right...I'm living...you're making me live...I'm living through love...
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
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