Submitted by Albert G.
Step one: Smoke meth
Step two: Install wood paneling
Step three: Grow pedostache
Step four: Don wifebeater and chain
Step five: Record video
Step six: Get comments like this:
"I don't get it. Are you enjoying it, are yoiu getting turned on making your own hand into a pussy? And in the end, are you massaging her tits, while eating her pussy? Then her pussy must be located between her tits, which make her a mutant lady? You dont really know how to do it do you?"
"Omg great video, remindsÿ me of my grandmother"
"dis nigga is ugly as hell and he is so fukin gay that wuz not even how u eat a pussy come on man i bet if i tried that my girl would hav not even moan orÿ groan"
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
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