I've made my peace with the balloon shaped like a balloon on page 1, but a camera used to take a picture of a camera is just far too meta for my tastes.

Apparently this balloon man is from the Lord of the Rings, but I can't see what distinguishes him as Elvish.

Make all your fantasies of killing everyone close to you come true without the inconvenience of upsetting your parents by sporting this family-friendly flamethrower.

This gumball machine is made of balloons, but what about the contents? Are they real gumballs or just small balloons? The world will never know.

More Comedy Goldmine

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Meditations from a Movable Weiner

    Sometimes I dream that I'm sitting in the back of the defunct Weinermobile as it careens driverless down the highway. At first I thought this was symbolic of the powerlessness I feel in life, but then I realized it's actually the Weinermobile's dream of being able to drive again.

  • BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    BarkWire.com Dog Reviews: The Barquis de Sade & Cleaver

    Three years ago, when we were burying my uncle, Cleaver and some gross lady dog (Solstice???) showed up at the cemetery and starting going at it really loudly. It ruined everything and we had to have a "re-do" the next day and it cost a fortune. I've hated him ever since for that.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.