Special Move List: Hurtwell
HURTWELL
HURTWELL was a simple, peaceful boy from the rural Shugo prefecture of Kentucky, America. His father was a moonshiner of liquors, and his mother a seamsman. HURTWELL was trained by the master ORIGINAL RICK, and he used his powers of fighting only for protection and romance, until one day his parents were kidnapped by the evil EMPEROR SHOZO. From that day forth, HURTWELL knew his destiny would be to win the MASTER OF CHAMPION FIGHTING TOURNAMENT and secure the freedom of his parents and world!
DOB: 10/26/1978
HEIGHT: 5'09"
BLOOD TYPE: R
SEX: MALE
FIGHTING TECHNIQUE: AMERICA BRAWL
Attacks
| Input | Move Name |
 +  |
Palooken |
 +  |
Trout Kick |
 + |
Wolf Toucher |
 + |
Racially-Motivated Haymaker |
|
Rick's Original Famous Punch |
 + |
Nickelbackhand |
 |
Chops of Jupiter |
 + |
Shogun Sacktap |
| + |
Five-Finger Discount |
 + |
VCR Throw |
| |
Face Parade |
 + |
Lactate |
| + |
Handjab |
Throws / Grabs
| Input | Move Name |
| + |
Dude Huck |
+  |
Non-Confrontational Powerbomb |
 + |
Flying Chiropractic Subluxator |
| + |
Bon Piledr-Iver |
 + |
Atomic Nurple |
| + |
Tokyo Grope |
Blocks / Counters
| Input | Move Name |
|
Damage Prevention Elbow |
| |
Fetal Position |
| |
Reverse Cowgirl |
| |
Opposite Day |
| + |
John Mayall's Bluesbreaker |
Taunts
| Input | Move Name |
| + |
Insincere Flattery |
| |
Jerky-Offy Motion |
 |
Classic False Frisbee Throw Dog Fakeout |
| |
Verbal Warning |
Ultra Finishers
| Input | Move Name |
+  |
Tearful Neck Snap of Mercy |
+  |
Get Your Brother To Do This One |
Special thanks to Abraham, DocEvil & Greg P. for difficult control input.
This Week on Something Awful...
-
Guess who's back! (It's me. (I am.))
AwfulVision
You (didn't) want it, you got it (anyway)! AwfulVision is back!
-
A Sink Cat, A Cool Rug
Comedy Goldmine
Wilford Brimley cat gets wet. Dragon Lady rug draws praise. Threads deliver what's promised.
-
The Dictator; What to Expect When You're Expecting; Hick
Current Releases
Summer is in full swing, which means everything is terrible.
-
How To Become Campfire Guitar Guy
Music Article
The only acceptable fireside song is the hidden track on Nirvana's Nevermind.
