I AM A MOTHERFUCKIN' T-REX. GOT A PROBLEM WITH CAPITAL LETTERS? TOO FUCKIN' BAD; I AM A T-REX. I AM HERE TO SHOW YOU MY MOTHERFUCKIN' VACATION. LET'S GO CHUMPS.
HERE I AM ON MY MOTHERFUCKIN' TRAMPOLINE. I LANDED ON MY HEAD AND IT HURT BUT I AM A BAD MOTHERFUCKIN' T-REX AND CAN TAKE THE PAIN YOU PUSSIES CAN'T.
THIS IS UNCLE TED. HE IS KIND OF WEIRD.
FIRST I WENT TO THAT MOTHER WAL-FUCKIN'-MART TO GET SOME SHIT. A T-REX HAS TO SHOP SOME TIMES BUT THESE CHUMPS MADE THE STORE WAY TOO SMALL..
ON MY WAY OUT OF TOWN I STOPPED BY MY FAVORITE PUB. THESE GUYS KNOW WHERE IT IS AT AND WHO THE MOTHERFUCKIN' T-REX IS.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!