This is the first thing that I've ever written with another person. At its best, collaborative writing leads to a harmonious overlap of the sensibilities of both writers. At its worst it causes your hair to fall out and makes you age three times faster. Those are true facts from a book so don't argue with me.
How did this update come to be? It's an unfathomably boring story. My dog kl0pper and I go way back, to the beginning of the week, when he IM'd me about something else I wrote. I read some stuff that he had written and it was pretty funny, and then he brought up the idea that became this article and asked if I wanted to write it with him. I said yes and volunteered to share this Sunday's spot with him. We threw stuff back and forth over AIM for the last few nights and this is what came out of it. If you see anything unfunny in there, the odds are that it's my fault, but kl0pper lives in Thailand so I guess you could still make fun of him for that.
He should be along directly to give his side of the story. I haven't read it yet but I can assure you it's all bullshit. Oh look there he is! Everyone hide.
"I've been a big fan of this website for years, so being able to contribute to it is an honor. It was a lot of fun working with Seth, and I hope that everyone gets a kick out of it. I know how much it sucks when this site doesn't deliver (which is very rarely), and I hope this isn't one of those times. I'm not going to put my email address up here because he tells me that you get a lot of spam for doing so but if you want to tell me what you think you can email him and his mom will forward it to me.
P.S. I don't watch TV so I don't know if these are real shows but Seth assures me they are."
We hope you enjoyed reading this as much as we enjoyed writing it. I'd love to stay around and chat about it some more but the methadone clinic is calling my name! You're all beautiful! Don't ever change!
I want my bed to look like the health department is checking for bedbugs. I want to feel like it’s on an episode of Maury getting scanned for semen.
Do all of your holiday shopping in the Star Citizen online store! We have great deals on space ships for a game that may not be released for years. Think of these as investments in your future enjoyment.
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
The Daily Dirt serves as a column for all Something Awful frontpage writers to write about, well, whatever they feel like putting into the Daily Dirt!