The Crackhead Clubhouse. They do drugs so you don't have to. Not that you should, because it is illegal, and the stuff here is only for informational purposes and blah blah blah. BRB Buddy probably does drugs, but he also does Forum Fridays:

Philadelphia paraphernalia ban OVERTURNED! - In an amazing table-turning lawsuit by many big tobacco companies, the famous "Philly Blunt Ban" has been overturned and single cigar sales are finally legal again in the city! Thanks big tobacco, this blunt's for you!

The Adderall and Friends Megathread - A very informative thread about the recreational and medicinal use of amphetamines such as (trade names) Adderall, Dexedrine, Desoxyn (methamphetamine) and Ritalin. Amphetamines are commonly-prescribed stimulants (commonly referred to as "speed") used in the treatment of narcolepsy, ADD/ADHD, and various other mental disorders. They're also lots of fun to do. Read this thread to find out how YOU can have fun (and be safe!) with amphetamines.

The Drug Test FAQ Thread - Well, it's that time of year again. Colleges are about to let out and high schoolers are looking to snag the good jobs before the kids come home. All of us at Something Awful are lazy susans and get welfare checks in the mail while browsing internet forums, but maybe some of you aren't! Are you a drug user? Tired of buying some lemonade before heading into that scary bathroom to piss in a cup? Well, read this drug test thread and find out how to clean your wastes and keep your drug use under wraps!

The Great Bong Contest of 2007! - Check out some of these amazing bongs! This is the voting thread for the Great Bong Contest of 2007, so if you have a SA Forums account, vote for your favorite bong and maybe it will win! They're all so good, how can you choose just one?

Ask me about being an amphetamine dealer/chemist - PhreeX told me to not make him look like an ass, and how the hell could I do such a thing? This thread is one of the most interesting reads I've ever seen in TCC, and I don't even do meth. PhreeX's knowledge of chemistry and especially amphetamine synthesis is astounding. Read some fun anecdotes about amphetamine psychosis, hyper-paranoia, the common meth customer, and why dealing meth is probably a horrible idea (but pays very well).

Amanita Muscaria plans - A semi-live trip report on Amanita muscaria, or the "Fly Agaric" mushroom found in Scandinavia and Russia. Amanita muscaria can be highly psychoactive, but this poster didn't have such a nice time, so he did what any TCCer would do...take more drugs! Check out what happens when he downs 2 hits of LSD!

Post pictures of yourself on drugs! - A TCC classic, here's the self-incrimination station in all it's finest! Most of these people are probably in jail because of the federales, but that doesn't mean we can't have a good laugh at stoned goons!

The Official Traveling with Drugs thread - Need to get away? Why not do it with a little green? Tons of suggestions related to getting your drugs from one side of the country to the other in this informative guide contributed to by many TCCers! Read it and weep, coppers!

The Firing Range. Guns! Who doesn't like guns? I mean, besides victims of gun violence. King Hotpants shoots down this forum.

This is a thread about AR15s. TenementFunster goes over his area of expertise: America's Rifle, the AR-15.

Empty Your Pockets. dirty urine test wants to know what you've got in your pockets, so dump them out and take a picture. It's amazing that some people can walk.

Miso Beno's Awesome Wallpaper Party. It's a simple concept - high-resolution, wallpaper quality photographs of guns. Be as artsy as you want. Definitely a no-no for slow connections, as some of these images are huge.

The Book Barn is neither a book nor a barn, but Captain Asthma doesn't know it yet. Shhh, it will be our little secret.

Book Covers - I'm judging this thread and I'm determining it doesn't suck as bad as the rest of them, at least on the surface. Check out some of the best and worst book covers you'll ever see.

Essential Western Literature - If you can't figure out what this thread is about, you probably have no business trying to read a book.

Science Fiction Recommendation Thread - If you've ever wondered which story about space mutants will sate your deviant desires, ask here.

Goons With Spoons cooks up a horrible surprise... and here it is, it's kiteless!

Smelly urine (w/pics!) - Sam_I_Am shows us how make three delicious dishes using asparagus so everyone can try piss out stinky sulfuric pee later on.

Sports Argument Stadium. If you can't play the game, complain about it! SaxMaverick takes us into the exciting world of armchair everythings.

NASCAR: Nextel Cup '07... Any "Juan" but Jimmie Johnson Please - SAS's ongoing NASCAR megathread. Come in for the Car of Tomorrow, stay for the banjo of Yesterday!

2nd Annual No-Hitter Challenge! - Headless Norseman heads up the second installment of the craze sweeping the forums: The No Hitter Challege. Predict the first no hitter of the season, win $30! Current favorite is the 8-year old girl in section 2A against the Devil Rays.

NCAA Women's Basketball - More like FUNdamentals! - I and a few other goons try desperately to feel ok about watching and cheering for women's basketball. KJI cheers for RU, I for Tennessee, and 93,000 SomethingAwful users ridicule.

To Catch a Predator: SAS Edition - SAS goons, led by the MS-Paint master Gendo, draw encounters with sports stars/rapists and predator predator Chris Hansen. One of a few actually funny threads SAS produces (most by Gendo)

Favorite Football Player Nicknames - Reminisce about nicknames of today and yesterday such as "The Assassin", "Refrigerator" Perry, Adam Jones, and of course Kwame "IFUCKINGHATEYOUYOUWORTHLESSPIECEOFSHITGETOFFMYTEAM" Harris

MLB News/Views Thread: So David Wells was in Twister! - Spring Training is underway! Follow news and/or views in Deranged Hermits thread and prepare yourself for America's Timekiller until football starts again.

NCAA Elite Eight 3/25 - Winona State Suicide Watch - A gameday thread that will double for discussion until the next round of March Madness. If you have to ask about the thread title, you'll never know.

Tubby Smith to become head coach at the University of Minnesota - Is Minnesota reaching for glory, or is Tubby Smith settling for mediocrity? You decide!

Hell2DaNaw.com: Let's take jorts to the blogosphere! - The future award-winning college football blog is looking for writers to speak on the sanctity of the NCAA Student-Athlete.

That's all for this week! Everybody be very nice and please thank the forum representative for making this all possible. Thank you, from the bottom of my bottomless, black, vile heart!

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@lowtax)

More Forum Friday's Monday

This Week on Something Awful...

  • We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    We Are Ready to Announce That Grimace is Human

    It's true. Grimace is human. God help us, we did our best for him.

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.