Gutentag, meine damen und herren.
Today is a somber day for the Reich. It is the day we honor our brave men und women in uniform who have fallen in combat. These proud Nazi warriors have given all they have to the cause and to the Fatherland. We remember their names, their heroism, and their deeds. We honor their service to our great nation.
You've heard of #BlackLivesMatter and #AllLivesMatter, but the ancient voice of a mountain offers us the hardest truth of all: #NoLivesMatter. And also some opinions about immigrants.
The ISIS head of propaganda holds a brainstorming session with his top men to come up with new viral videos.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.