This article is part of the Video Game Classifieds series.
Rapture, the world's most inspiring monument to the unchained and unfettered potential of Man's Will, is served by a number of newspapers, including the Rapture Standard and the Rapture Tribune. Like all respectable rags, these two titans feature classified ads helping the free residents of this great underwater free market city buy, sell, and trade without any interference from government parasites. These are some of those classified ads.
Obviously, the first thing necessary to getting back in shape is buying a bunch of expensive knick-knacks.
Finally, a look at the candidate's long-delayed tax returns.
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Find power-ups and more browsing classified ads plucked from the highly logical world of video games.