[Alien cremalisks swoop down through the ashy skies and scream as they blast cones of superheated magma breath on the surrounding colony. Tracers of anti-aircraft blasters harmlessly sputter through the air. Riddick watches the sight of a massive cremalisk incinerating a hyper truck. It explodes and shrapnel nearly decapitates Riddick.]
RIDDICK: Bad idea.
[He leaps into the air and pulls the cremalisk to the ground. Its neck snaps and its head flops lifeless onto the ground. Onlookers cheer Riddick. He puts his goggles on and walks away ignoring the cheers.]
[Riddick stands in the smoky war bunker looking at the haggard troopers and the civilians. A stern and handsome woman approaches him.]
WOMAN: You did pretty good out there.
RIDDICK: I've seen this before. Hepatitis IX.
WOMAN: You know how to kill them.
RIDDICK: Everything dies.
WOMAN: You have to help us!
RIDDICK: Not my fight.
WOMAN: Please. You must! You saw what they did to the colony.
[Riddick's eyes flash.]
RIDDICK: Bad things happen all the time. Get used to it. Now if you'll excuse me [puts on goggles] I have a ship to catch.
[Riddick walks out of the bunker and into the ruins of the city.]
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
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