(Friends, before you become entirely crippled with ebook-related mirth, be sure to check out this week's Twitter Tuesday for more from the exciting world of ebook spam!)
In case you read my profile online and got excited, I wanted to clear up any misunderstandings.
In a Something Awful exclusive, we reveal the true state of Darren Wilson after his harrowing encounter with Michael Brown.
The Something Awful front page news tackles anything both off and on the Internet. Mostly "on" though, as we're all incredible nerds.