SpaceMouse has never actually been seen in the same room as his prized "World's Largest Pumpkin." PERHAPS THEY ARE ONE IN THE SAME??
Spiffarino is the world's soggiest man, a title he earned for himself by soaking in a tub of milk for five days.
Spiffarino's dying wish is to be fed to starving children.
Straws hasn't been the same since the bastards took his Matlock away.
You Will Read This Headline. Then You'll Laugh. Then You'll Realize You Were Wrong All Along.
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