Hey, it's spring now, which means it's the start of what we in the Midwest call "water-drinkin' season." After a winter spent as a hibernating husk, it's time to brave the muggy heat with a canteen on your hip! If you're going to a gym, you should probably bring a sports-style bottle instead of a canteen, or someone will look you dead in the eye and say something like (mockingly) "hey buddy, take a hike with that thing!" or (poignantly) "you're a better man than I am, Gunga Din." However, if you do bring a sports-style bottle, be prepared to face these witty barbs from FYAD's list of hydration quips!

no they will not

  • Someone's a thirsty boy, haha drink up
  • [exaggerated drinking noises]
  • [pretending to look around] uhhh... Where's the marathon?


  • jesus christ...idiocracy really was a documentary *roll your eyes while saying this*

  • calm down buddy the bottle aint going anyhere haha
  • [in a really nerdy voice] The Gatorade Company, Inc. is a brand of sports-themed beverage and food products, built around its signature line of sports drinks. Gatorade is currently manufactured by PepsiCo and distributed in over 80 countries.[3] The beverage was first developed in 1965 by researchers at the University of Florida, to replenish the combination of water, carbohydrates, and electrolytes that the school's student-athletes lost in sweat during rigorous athletic competitions. Its name was derived from the collective nickname of the university's athletic teams, the Florida Gators.

Daikatana Ritsu

Determination. Strength. Fitness. Lemon-lime. Grape.

Daikatana Ritsu

Football Guy: Sometimes we freeze up the sports drinks and make lil slushies out of em. Hydration and fun, woouah.

no they will not

[at the gym] doing some reps on the water bottle huh. I prefer the bench press myself. Just kidding - stay hydrated.

[near the gym] pretty funny to see you drinking that water when you could be working out for health and aesthetics

[far away from the gym] most days I do actually work out but this is my "day off" since I've been so good recently haha

James Hardon

*Searching pockets* Let me guess, plain water again? Jesus Christ. *Finds Crystal Light packet and tears it open* Yeah that's all well and good for some people, but me *Pours contents of packet into my own sports bottle* I actually like flavor in my beverages. *Shakes bottle, uncaps it and takes a long swig* Fucking homo.

no they will not

[if the guy drinking is gay] hey, I see you're enjoying sucking on that water bottle. Sucking it right down and drinking the fluids. *mimes sucking a woman's titty* freud much

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