Soliciting advice about things like hedge trimming, basket weaving, or how to convince your girlfriend to bring another woman to bed is one of the few productive things you could do with this horrible invention we call the Internet. But there's one thing that has always amazed me, people who ask for medical advice online. The only answer to any medical advice question should be, "GO TO A FUCKING DOCTOR OH GOD WHY AREN'T YOU GOING TO SEE A DOCTOR ALREADY AND EVEN IF YOU CAN'T SEE A DOCTOR COMING FOR HERE FOR HELP IS THE LAST THING YOU SHOULD EVER DO."

Someone sharing inappropriate personal information over the Internet? I can't believe it! I'd be more surprised if this person didn't tell us about their farts.

This is a question I hope I am never asked.

Not his sperm. My sperms, on the other hand.

You want love, not sex? Why didn't you say so? Love is a whole lot cheaper than sex.

Dr. Internet, paging Dr. Internet.

Loathing doctors and drug companies? That's just another symptom of asperger's!

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