What we call our nation's Capitol has become a stinking swamp of
vice and corporate cronyism, special interests, and literally
billions of dirty dollars. It's time that one man got a piece of
that swamp pie. It's time that Vermin Supreme got a little of that
dirty, dirty money!
My fellow Americans, I give you Vermin Supreme. A politician with years of psychotic hobo experience, who can reach across party lines to deck a guy for looking the wrong way. Someone who isn't afraid to take bribes, corporate handouts, or whatever prescription medication he might find in the White House trash cans. The United States needs another retarded motherfucker that totally lacks experience and vision in the electoral race, but more importantly America needs to be entertained. We've still got an entire year of boring campaigning, lame ass mudslinging thats less effect than a random derogatory youtube comment, and I don't think that's what our country needs. What our country needs is someone who has a plan for Dental Hygiene on the national stage, telling Obama and Edwards about the ghosts that tell us what to do while we are asleep.
In a Something Awful exclusive, we reveal the true state of Darren Wilson after his harrowing encounter with Michael Brown.
gee, sun, thanks for life and warmth and light. you totally did it on purpose and aren't just a stupid exploding deathtrap
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.