Alien Abduction, How To Prevent, submitted by Tr3vor. Finally, a site to help prepare you for the growing problem of being abducted by either aliens or spiritual beings!
You are being abducted often by what seems like aliens. They come after you go to bed and soon after (or just before) you begin to sleep, paralyze you and float you out of bed, maybe even through your solid wall!
How dare they violate my solid walls! THEY DO NOT HAVE THE RIGHT TO DO THAT! Here is a bit from one of their guides to resisting abduction:
Making sure you are completely awake and taking your powerful flash lights, proceed cautiously to your electrical service box. If you encounter any materialized Jinns, they can not abduct you. But they can harass. They can bombard you with telepathic messages or a loud high pitched sound. Be prepared to use the physical resistance methods of Ann Druffel's book (over-view coming up) if you encounter them. Carry weapons; golf club, baseball bat, a gun if you have one. First try shining the beam of the powerful flashlight right at them (if you have time or the merciful inclination). They should back off. Otherwise, let them have it. They have no right under the Laws Of God to be there or doing that to you!Make your way to your electrical service box and flip on any circuit breakers that are off. The Jinns may have flipped all off, or only the one to your room, or the big main switch.(Actually, this scenario rarely, if ever, happens. But... it could! Determined Jinns could easily learn to do it!)
I certainly hope materialized Jinns respect God's law, or else that's going to make for a sticky situation!
Keep this in mind: The abductors are violating YOUR RIGHTS!
If you think you're about to be abducted, CALL A LAWYER IMMEDIATELY!
In case you read my profile online and got excited, I wanted to clear up any misunderstandings.
In a Something Awful exclusive, we reveal the true state of Darren Wilson after his harrowing encounter with Michael Brown.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.