The Demon Possession Handbook For Human Service Workers Home Pag, submitted by Dbussani. So you've successfully defended yourself from the horrible alien invasion feature in yesterday's Awful Link of the Day, yet you can't free yourself from the tyranny of the Demons and their evil, deadly clutches. Thank God for the Internet which provides, in an insanely detailed amount of text, the key to living a demon-free and fun-filled life. The Demon Possession Handbook provides tips that, among other sources, quote Geraldo Rivera TV episodes. If that's not a sign of quality, I don't know what is.
When Jesus Christ died on the cross as your supreme sin sacrifice, His blood didn't just seep into the ground and return to dust. It became the active agent in the salvation of all persons who accept Him as their personal savior. Satan respects the power of the Blood and recognizes it as the source of your salvation. Therefore, not only do you need to be filled with the Holy Spirit initially, you need to pray constantly to God for the power of the shed blood of Jesus Christ to cover you, and for the power of the Holy Spirit to surround you.
After you have been delivered from your demon(s), expect it to come back and try to possess you again. This is why it is so important that you are filled with the Holy Spirit when you seek deliverance from your demon. When the Holy Spirit is inside your soul, He will both cleanse you from the effects of demon possession and give you the power to stay free from demons as well.
Make sure there is no unforgiven hidden sin in your life. Demons play dirty, especially when their happy home is being threatened. They may know about your unforgiven sins and won't hesitate to blurt out all the dirty little facts through the mouth of the victim you are trying to help.
Ha ha, this site truly is "Something Awful," LOL LOL LOL LOLLLLLLOPLOLOLOLEOGKOGLRI($(@(2-3/t//. Sorry, I think I'm possessed by a demon. A very stupid demon.
REFORMED HOG - Former member of the swine family, has now agreed to behave like a proper dog. Free to patient home willing to overlook physical defects. 555-2519
What do you do when The Dark Knight himself pulls a boner?
Available in Large, which is actually a Medium stretched out to appear bigger.
If you're in a tight spot, this is going to be really helpful (I'M JOKING. I'M KIDDING AROUND)
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