Jeremy's Prophecy, submitted by Craig. True prophets are very hard to find these days. The line between "crazy person" and "amazing prophet" is a fine one, and in some cases it is difficult to tell which category a person falls under. This is not one of those cases.
Crammed in his highchair, squatting peas with his fists, Jeremy went into a trance and chanted deep, vibrating, mantra like noises.
Jeremy's Prophecy is dedicated to a man. A man who, after attempting suicide, "became anew." Apparently he wrote 54 phrases, or Must Says, that hold great philosophical insight, Take, for example, Must Say #39: "We are forgiven. I can only use words for so long. They are just symbols anyway. Love yourself. Love your Brother. Please. Pretty please with sugar on top." Wow. That is deeper than The Marianas Trench. But don't just take my word for it. Join the legions of his psychotic fans online, and discuss your favorite Jeremy Moments. Oh, how we laughed when "He never smiled often looked tormented and rarely communicated." And how we cried when "he predicted the assignation attempt on President Ronald Reagan." Oh Jeremy, whatever happened to you? Jeremy, your favorite sport was "Walking" and favorite musician was "Unknown." I will never let you go.
Update: Well it seems this is not a real site at all, but an advertisement. Maybe in the future I will read the sites instead of just looking at the pretty pictures.
What if you were a cop and the Skittle was mentally disturbed and wanted to be eaten?
DOPPELGANGER NEEDED - To minimize stress to my dog, I'm looking for somebody who is identical to me to take over ownership. Must also be able to fool my wife. Call to set up interview. 555-8252
I'll never forgive these giant alien insects! I'm trying!
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