Jeremy's Prophecy, submitted by Craig. True prophets are very hard to find these days. The line between "crazy person" and "amazing prophet" is a fine one, and in some cases it is difficult to tell which category a person falls under. This is not one of those cases.
Crammed in his highchair, squatting peas with his fists, Jeremy went into a trance and chanted deep, vibrating, mantra like noises.
Jeremy's Prophecy is dedicated to a man. A man who, after attempting suicide, "became anew." Apparently he wrote 54 phrases, or Must Says, that hold great philosophical insight, Take, for example, Must Say #39: "We are forgiven. I can only use words for so long. They are just symbols anyway. Love yourself. Love your Brother. Please. Pretty please with sugar on top." Wow. That is deeper than The Marianas Trench. But don't just take my word for it. Join the legions of his psychotic fans online, and discuss your favorite Jeremy Moments. Oh, how we laughed when "He never smiled often looked tormented and rarely communicated." And how we cried when "he predicted the assignation attempt on President Ronald Reagan." Oh Jeremy, whatever happened to you? Jeremy, your favorite sport was "Walking" and favorite musician was "Unknown." I will never let you go.
Update: Well it seems this is not a real site at all, but an advertisement. Maybe in the future I will read the sites instead of just looking at the pretty pictures.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.