Down-home, honest-to-goodness folks that are being controlled every moment of every day by "perps" using some form of radio waves.
"monkey100" is a failure, and it's obviously the work of mysterious shadow-people and not caused by anything he did.
"PhuqPhukme" thinks he has Immortal Spirit 1 backup, but the perps already called No Immortal Spirit 1 backups times infinity.
At first glance I thought his name was "KevinSmith" and I was going to say that this post explains Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.
"fairywoman2003" forgot to pay her bills.
I just tried this tip and I heard some stuff but I think it was coming from a TV in another room.
MIND CONTROLS ACTIVATE
boop beep boop
COMMAND: WASH MY CAR
The treacherous New England Patriots are guilty of deflating their footballs. We must punish them severely in the name of holy retribution. This transgression has been the biggest headline in the United States for an entire week, and it should be the primary concern of all nations.
We have used extensive market research to determine the average consumers of America's favorite rolls of caramel-oozing choco cysts.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.