Transtopia, submitted by Tyler. Do you consider yourself better than the flock of sheep around you, and masturbate over your SAT and IQ scores daily? Are you pretentious and consider yourself an evolutionary step beyond the barbarians that are running this world? Are you a fan of the original Lost in Space? If yes to all these questions, Transtopia is the site for you:
Eritis sicut dii -- you shall be as gods. It's time to leave our stifling earthly cradle and fulfill our evolutionary destiny among the stars...or die trying. There's nothing to lose except a short, brutish existence, so onwards, past the event horizon and into the heart of the technological Singularity! If taking personal empowerment to its logical extreme sounds like your cup of tea, you have definitely come to the right place. If not, well, you might want to look around a bit anyway; you're practically guaranteed to expand your mind in Transtopia's vast and complex memespace.
Gorsh those sure are a bunch of purty words. I feel smarter and a little gay already.
In fact, there is even an "E-Test" on the site to measure how enlightened you really are! They even numbered the questions in Roman numerals to ensure that only the elite brains of our society will participate. I randomly mashed my mouse and finished the test in less then 10 seconds only to find out that I am borderline enlightened. Well they certainly had me pegged as a "modern satanist" but I was really hoping to be a Transtopian Master. I will only be able to glance into their Illuminati club from a frosty window, wondering what may have become if only I was more of an ego starved, lonely nerd.
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.