The Kid From Brooklyn, submitted by Og Oggilby. A large, loud man with a successful ticket agency moonlights as a large, loud man who films himself yelling on the Internet. A terrifying nightmare or another beautiful Internet dream?
I would like to take the time to introduce myself to you. My name is Michael Caracciolo. I am the president of a ticket company in New Jersey. However, although I have been in the ticket business for many years, I am certain that I am in the wrong profession. I should be an actor instead. I believe that I possess all the qualities necessary for success as an actor. I am a very conversational person, my voice easily projects, via my six foot six inch 400 pound amplifier! I also sing. My unique background, persona and life’s experience truly qualify me as one of a kind .The material recorded here is ad-libbed, improvisational and spontaneous. It contains profanity which is offered only in support of demonstrating my dramatic intensity and the context of the material. I am certain that after watching it once you will immediately want to contact me.
Watch as the big man rants and raves about various hot button issues in a futile attempt to make it big in Hollywood. I like yelling at my computer screen too, but I'm smart enough to consider it a dark secret and not a hidden talent.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
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