Artimations, submitted by Homicide. One of the quickest and easiest ways to tell if a site will explode your eyes is by seeing a "GOLD WEBMASTER'S GUILD HTML ACE STUD GRAPHCIS PRO" award plastered across it. If you brag about winning animated gif Internet awards from defunct Tripod sites, then that's a pretty sure sign that you're clearly insane. Artimations would've been declared a national disaster back in 1996, when lightning gifs freely roamed the Internet, and neon green tables were considered a "necessity." Let's see here, we got Megadeath midis blaring out, hundreds of explosions and lightning blasts, text obscured by tables and graphics, a series of "ENTER HERE" links which lead to even more "ENTER HERE" links, and CG "artwork" with the requisite water / metal orb crammed into the foreground. But hey, good news: you can buy CG printouts of pirate ships for $500! Wow!

UGH I HATE MOVIES

'Embarking on the Journey'
36" x 48"
Museum Quality Canvas
Mounted..............................................................................$500.00
Lithograph Print..................................................................$100.00

That's a heck of a deal! Here's an even better deal: I NEVER VISIT THIS SITE AGAIN.

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@lowtax)

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