The Official Street Preachers, submitted by JiggaJWheels.
Gosh, I should hope that the readers of Something Awful are web-savvy enough to settle for no less than the official street preachers. Sure, there maybe some unofficial street preachers out there, denouncing homosexual sex in their own quaint ways, but nothing can top the fervent denunciations made by the real guys.
WHEN YOU HAVE A BUNCH OF GIRLY MEN ABUSING THEMSELVES WITH EACH OTHER IN SEXUALLY PERVERTED WAYS...THEIR BRAIN CHEMISTRY CHANGES AND THEY NO LONGER DESIRE GOD'S GIFT TO THEM....A.K.A. WOMEN.
THIS WICKED BEHAVIOR LEADS TO A NATURAL DECLINE IN THE POPULATION OF THE COUNTRY BECAUSE THE PERVERTS ARE NOT ABLE TO REPRODUCE. (THANK GOD)
Get out there and make a stink, guys! Homos are overrunning us and driving down OUR PRECIOUS POPULATION!
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.