I Am the Fat Girl Poem (Comments & Responses), submitted by YouTube. I am the fat girl
I kind of look like the skinny lesbian from that Patton Oswalt comedy tour
Except I swallowed an inflatable raft and mistook the inflate line for a tampon string
I'll recite my atrocious poetry on YouTube
People will compliment me and I will appreciate it
I will not realize they'd compliment anything I did because most of the population feels forced to say "good job" and "that's beautiful" to any poetry
This is so they don't look stupid (or so they think)
I'd finish this poem but I mistook my hand for a canned ham and bit it in half
That really fucking hurts
Hows about you, me, and five uncomfortable minutes in my basement apartment next to the dusty Christmas tree that's still up from my last visit with my estranged children.
The Upper Kitchen Cabinet Where Your Roommate Keeps His Food: You’ll 'need the footstool' to reach your roommate’s 'fine selection' of 'stale cereal,' but he'll never notice if 'only a little is missing from each box.' Feel less guilty by reminding yourself that Jeff 'acts weird around your girlfriend,' and always 'asks about her.' What a 'creep.'
This ain't your daddy's globe...! .... or is it?!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.