I Am the Fat Girl Poem (Comments & Responses), submitted by YouTube. I am the fat girl
I kind of look like the skinny lesbian from that Patton Oswalt comedy tour
Except I swallowed an inflatable raft and mistook the inflate line for a tampon string
I'll recite my atrocious poetry on YouTube
People will compliment me and I will appreciate it
I will not realize they'd compliment anything I did because most of the population feels forced to say "good job" and "that's beautiful" to any poetry
This is so they don't look stupid (or so they think)
I'd finish this poem but I mistook my hand for a canned ham and bit it in half
That really fucking hurts
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
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