My Pet DMV, submitted by veeyo. It would be easy to discard this website as a really stupid concept that lets people make a driver's license for their pet. In truth, it's a really stupid concept that is perfectly targeted for millions of really stupid people. Those people dress their cats in Halloween costumes and give them Christmas presents. They may need valid ID for their cat to make the fantasy of marriage to their pet complete and this is about as close as they will get.

Charged with grand theft auto, reckless driving and driving without a license, I was looking at 5-10 years in a maximum security cat farm. I threw myself on the mercy of the court. Fortunately, the Judge was a cat lady, and I was lucky to walk away with 5 years probation and a community obligation to make the roads a safer place for all pets around the U.S.A.

Somewhere out there a crazy cat lady is getting ready to empty her entire 401k into pet IDs. They may live in filth, but by God they will live in filth able to legally operate an imaginary motor vehicle! Unfortunately, some day the terrorists are going to smuggle a bomb onto a plane posing as golden retrievers.

– Zack "Geist Editor" Parsons (@sexyfacts4u)

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

  • SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.