ARIANNRISING!, submitted by . Vampire zombie Satanic Elf goth moron arises from the grave to attack the human population with inhuman poetry and idiotic gothic ramblings. Includes approximately 15 thousand photos of the self-professed "Vampire Queen," each one more hideous than the rest.

Handsome as the first day i met you,you lay in the coffin that ill never see

Okay here are some of the things I love..I love dead flowers and my favorites are roses and daisies. I like to burn candles and incense. My absolute favorite holiday in the world is Halloween.

Oh, the bitter angst! It's like a carnival and a pancake makeup caravan colliding near the street in front of your house. Whatever you do, make absolutely 100% sure to check out the photos of her gothic boyfriend, who should have a wooden stake rammed through his heart... regardless if he's a vampire. He's what scientists routinely refer to as "a moron."

PS: There's a guestbook you can sign, but only if the Dark Lord allows you to do so. He probably won't though, as good ol' Scratch seems to prefer having his followers pose in cemeteries on Fridays.

– Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka (@lowtax)

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