Embassy Vending proudly claims "online since 1999." Judging by the site's aggressive ugliness, the company immediately adapted an already-five-years-outdated design and resisted all efforts to change it during the past decade, except possibly for the worse. Embassy made the letters in its logo sparkle and arranged them in a curve, so it looks like they tried to class up the home page by hanging a gold necklace on their shitty collection of graphics.
By selecting "click here for dorky animation," you breathe life into the talking Dollar Bill Changer, who says "please look over the specifications and the features of me," then makes weird chewing noises. Ziggy The Talking Clown says creepy things like "I have surprises for you." Sadly, the Notebook Paper machine is incapable of speech, so it can't answer queries such as "wide ruled or college ruled" and "who the fuck buys paper from vending machines?"
And you thought women had one-dimensional script intros that treated them like sex objects. Ewoks have it even worse.
No one seems to like the new Doom box art. But it's still the same old Doom Guy under that space marine helmet. Right?
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.