I hope you're sitting down, because I have some startling news that will shake you to your very core!
First of all, the year isn't 2013 A.D., it's 47 R.E. (Regenerated Era). Secondly, Jesus has returned in the form of a vlogger who draws naked ladies. Third, what we know as the planet Earth is actually the inside of a giant space egg. Fourth, Nazi scientists recruited by NASA discovered a glass barrier in the sky, but they are hiding the facts.
If you're still reading, you haven't gone into shock, which means you're strong enough to handle what you'll find at Miss Teri-Baby Lonestar, home of a webcomic artist (Steven Joseph Christopher, or 'StevieTheFox') who believes he's the returned reincarnated Christ. Other exposed truths include:
As for Miss Teri-Baby Lonestar, the webcomic this site is ostensibly about, it's basically Steve's way of selling all his great theories to the masses. It follows a perpetually naked former stripper (don't worry, there are stars censoring her naughty parts... most of the time) who hears heavenly messages from Stevie and makes the pilgrimage to Zion. Come for the boobs, stay for the religion! (Here's hoping Jack Chick is taking notes.) Oh, and like all great comics, it involves a fascinating origin story: Steven created it while he was in jail for making death threats against the president.
Sometimes, Miss Teri-Baby Lonestar awkwardly tries to replicate the typical comic-strip punchline structure. Most of the time, though, the only "storyline" is that Miss Teri-Baby has a sexy bod (note the whited-out doomsday date in that one) and everyone (including Stevie, the artist/messiah's stand-in) is super horny for her. She's also horny for Stevie (to an NWS extent), but for unexplained reasons they can't consummate their mutual attraction, so he sends her a naked angel instead. Sometimes Teri and the angel (named THE GIFT) take a break from the sex stuff so The GIFT can deliver a "science" lecture about how rainbows happen (it's just light filtered through the literal glass ceiling above us all).
As you've probably noticed from the multitude of videos embedded on every page, Steven is also a prolific vlogger. Naturally, he is personally insulted by all the atheists saying he doesn't exist, so occasionally he responds with weird, vaguely threatening videos. Remember when God used to flood the earth because people were praying to cows or whatever? Now he just tries to act like a tough guy on YouTube. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
TOTAL WRECK - crazy-eyed hound is covered in cobwebs, has a vespiary on back, graffiti on side and savage thirst for boat fuel. Frankly, I'm in over my head. He's in room 115 at Motel 6, yours free. 555-2851
Yes, it's the perfect form for surviving a car crash. But it's also the perfect form for so much more, like surviving the trauma of reading any news headline in 2016.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.