KeithToday was my sleep-in day. Well, everyday is a sleep-in day, but today is the end of daylight savings. I planned my schedule around that extra hour. I even stayed up super late last night watching Comedy Central. But Keith, the asshole who lives a floor below me, forgot to fix his alarm clock. I can hear that talk radio blaring from here. I'm not due at the Obama rally till 2, but I'm already up. Bah, he always does shit like this. If only there was some way to get his attention.
Go downstairs to Keith's apartment and remind him about daylight saving time.
Use life savings to buy a brick of cocaine. Strap drugs to an actual brick. Throw brick through Keith's window while making an anonymous phone call to local DEA agents informing them of a dangerous dealer.
Tucker Carlson's idiot brother just called New York mayor Bill de Blasio's spokeswoman a "LabiaFace."
Hey, have you guys ever seen a picture of a cat before? Well, guess what. It’s your lucky day, because I’m mixing the concept of a picture of my cat with the concept of the Internet!
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