You never know what Internet spirits you'll conjure with a Google Image Search for "ancient Chinese soldiers." The 36 Strategems sub-page takes its name from a list of "ancient Chinese military tactics," but site mastermind Ivan illustrates these maxims not with China-related artwork, but instead with a dazzling array of haunted-house GIFs.
Plunge into a fire to pull off a robbery.
Cross the path in the dark.
Hide a sword in a smile.
Amazingly, 36 Strategems has much more to offer than incongruously animated Chinese combative gambits. The sidebar sub-pages range from "Why do Mr. Nice Guy always finish last?" to "Detecting a lie ... and jokes about modern day bitches," from "How to solve life problems" to "DEALING WITH STRESS." The only common link between Nocturnal Ivan's various areas of expertise is the use of ridiculous unrelated GIFS to accompany every bullet point.
(Illustration for the blurb "Mr. Misogyny")
("Make friends with Godly people")
("The Buddhist way of obeserving problems")
The Amazonians value combat prowess and purity of spirit. By wrestling half naked, they pay homage to both virtues by displaying their battle-forged bodies while preserving as much modesty as their society deems necessary. The gelatin in which they wrestle is symbolic of the fluid nature of battle, a concept the Amazonians call ‘akgor-gra.’
Pros: Much more comfortable than my last toilet seat, which was a transparent resin with seashells embedded inside. The outer layer wore off from friction, exposing the sharp jagged edges of the seashells, which were constantly scrapping my backside and causing major cuts and open sores.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.