Managing the ROCKETRAVEN business, domain and e-mail will provide all necesseties to construct BIPOLAR ONTARIO or BPO. My dream BPO is a nonprofit open system geared directly to male teens and young adults suffering from manic depressive symptoms regardless of age or severity of disorder.

That sounds like an admirable goal. I trust that this noble ROCKETRAVEN business will present itself with dignity.


For all the discussion of what BIPOLAR ONTARIO will hypothetically achieve, there's not a lot of talk about what its ostensible benefactor ROCKETRAVEN actually does, other than a brief mention of "web design." The "references: sites compiled and in progress" section remains blank, so I guess "sole proprietor" Justin Myers expects the site's own design to speak for his talent level, which it does, loudly and unflatteringly. When not creating the giant JPEGs with centered, drop-shadowed text that pass for his page designs, Myers keeps himself busy in his home studio:

One may argue that Playstation 3 combined with bicept curls is procrastination but I have the discipline to treat it as a revitalizing recess and then return to my work focussed and more imaginative.


Hiring Myers based on this site seems like an unpromising choice, but you know what they say: Carpe ominous!

– Andrew "Garbage Day" Miller

More Awful Link of the Day

This Week on Something Awful...

  • Lair Flair!

    Lair Flair!

    Your lair. Maybe you lure victims to it, maybe you hide in it between killings, or maybe you haunt it 24/7 because you’re tragically confined by a curse. Whatever the situation, for most of us monsters, a living/un-living space is an important part of our identities. In this column, Monstergeddon award winners share their lair tips and techniques!

  • SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    SkyMall Product Review: Bark Deterring Ultrasonic Collar

    Works great on my child, who hasn't barked at all for as long as she's worn the apparatus. When she turns three, we will remove it for a trial period.

Copyright ©2014 Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka & Something Awful LLC.