Sandy Paws Pet Grooming Shop is located behind an animal clinic, meaning her aesthetically tortured dogs might be able to sneak a longing glance at kennel-incarcerated mutts awaiting euthanasia. Her prize poodle Cindy, subjected to such atrocious indignities as the "Cock a Poodle Doo" and the "Ninja Turtle Leonardoodle," looks pleadingly at the world with hauntingly deadened eyes. She exhibits the petrified demeanor of a living creature encased inside a graffiti-vandalized statue, limbs immobilized by a restrictive concrete outline. Perhaps because she's constantly sedated from inhaling Manic Panic fumes or sniffing the glue that's slathered over her fur, Cindy has yet to maul her oppressor, but when the canine revolution comes, Sandy Paws will not be spared.
Do all of your holiday shopping in the Star Citizen online store! We have great deals on space ships for a game that may not be released for years. Think of these as investments in your future enjoyment.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
It's still okay to like Ben Stiller, guys.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.