Sandy Paws Pet Grooming Shop is located behind an animal clinic, meaning her aesthetically tortured dogs might be able to sneak a longing glance at kennel-incarcerated mutts awaiting euthanasia. Her prize poodle Cindy, subjected to such atrocious indignities as the "Cock a Poodle Doo" and the "Ninja Turtle Leonardoodle," looks pleadingly at the world with hauntingly deadened eyes. She exhibits the petrified demeanor of a living creature encased inside a graffiti-vandalized statue, limbs immobilized by a restrictive concrete outline. Perhaps because she's constantly sedated from inhaling Manic Panic fumes or sniffing the glue that's slathered over her fur, Cindy has yet to maul her oppressor, but when the canine revolution comes, Sandy Paws will not be spared.
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.