The creators of Celebrity Apes pledge to morph famous faces until they become human-simian hybrids. It's a simple, if uninteresting, premise, but Celebrity Apes bungles every aspect of the execution, warping pictures in Photoshop's funhouse mirrors until they look less like chimps and more like plastic surgery disasters or decaying-flesh death masks. The only celebrities who end up looking anything like apes had huge head starts. Celebrity Apes enjoys affixing its clumsy distortions to cleavage-baring actressess, the most disturbing combination of primates and sexuality since 2001's wrong-in-a-million-ways Planet of the Apes remake, in which Marky Mark used his animal-talking skills to seduce a dirty monkey in a Helena Bonham-Carter wig.
The first phase of The Olive Garden's cyber rollout will introduce their Neverending Pneumatic Pasta Tube. This works on the same principal as bank drive-thru deposit tubes, but with unfrozen linguini and spaghetti.
Do you remember the crazy clothes and hair of the 1990s? Do you remember Crystal Pepsi and Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles? Do you remember where you hid the box your mother gave you?
Were you enjoying your day? STOP! There is outrageous crap going on you need to know about!
Awful Links of the Day spotlights the worst and weirdest websites on the internet. And we're not talking "weird" in a good way either.