Submitted by Ebbe H.
Man, Grover Cleveland really needs to get over the 1888 election. This isn't healthy.
"now i can be safe against dead pigs on hooksÿ and balloons"
"Personally, I use my Great Swords for cutting vegetables orÿ especially tough balloons at 10ft."
"Thank god! For years now I have been wondering what to do with all my raw meat, animal carcasses and thick lengths of rope, but Cold Steel has finally given me the answer!ÿ"
Maria Mitchell is shown holding a telescope to each eye, using them to ogle passing hunks on the street below. OOOGA! Her tongue rolls out like a firehose, her eyes comically bulging through the ends of the telescopes.
The Internet experience of 2014 has been condensed into a single article for your convenience.
As you may have noticed, the most popular viral videos at any given time are amazingly banal, annoying, and cliched pieces of waste. It almost seems as if the internet naturally gravitates towards the worst possible Youtube and Google video selections. So it stands to reason that if the terrible videos become popular, then the unpopular videos must be awesome! We here at Something Awful present to you AwfulVision™, our own patented service dedicated to showcasing a wide selection of unpopular videos that apparently must be good! Welcome to Web 3.9. Welcome to AwfulVision™!