After a hard day at work copying a bunch of images from an internet forum and passing articles like this off as my own doing, I like to kick back and enjoy a cool alcoholic drink. That's why I was keen to get some advice from few devoted kegmeisters known as the forum goons. Could they devise a drink masculine enough to help banish any unwanted desires I have to drink cocktails with little parasols? Of course not, they just wanted an excuse to pile as much crap in a glass as possible.
The first cocktail on offer came from Dubious Merit.
Memories of Scouting
2 oz. maple syrup (or maple-flavored breakfast syrup)
1/2 oz. Godiva brand milk chocolate liqueur
Generous amount of pumpkin ice cream
1/4 oz. Liquid Smoke
Drink very quickly, before you can think better of it.
The mitigating sweetness of the maple and the pumpkin long past, the campfire notes of the Liquid Smoke still pervade my senses. I cannot foresee a time when my world does not taste like bacon, although I am capable once more of breathing.
If that wasn't frightening enough, THE_Chris decided to take things to the next level with this refreshing beverage.
1x shot of Pina Colada
1x splash of Coca Cola (old, flat coke)
1/2x splash of luxury Strawberry Milkshake
Fill glass with orange juice
1x Ice cube
It was a genuinely confusing drink because it wasn't bad!
The flavor changed completely as it went down - sharp orange juice and Pina Colada at the top, then the Coke taste took over, then slightly alcoholic milkshake to finish off. I've never drunk anything that changed flavor like that.
Strange as I may sound, I'm making this again sometime.
2 PM: Steven J. accidentally drops his vintage Trapper Keeper, revealing erotic drawings of the ‘bunny girls’ emoji. The room draws silent. Slowly, member after member opens his/her notebooks and tablets, revealing dozens of pages of bunny girl emoji fanart. The room votes 12-0 never to speak of this again.
He was ripped off for True Detective, now Thomas Ligotti is being asked to review Pizza Hut's new Hotdog Pizza Bites.
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