Meooooowwwwww I'm not me, I'm actually my housecat. Meoooowwwwwwwlll. What are we doing with our lives? Meeeeooooowwwwwllllll.
EAT THE CHOCOLATE
Well your flirting with a weird cat lady over the Internet.
Jonas is about to lose his ninth life out of sheer embarrassment.
Oh god, I think someone's about to put the moves on a cat.
Someone doesn't want to go out with "Midnight-Helen"? How is that even possible?
Are you concerned that you may be a character trapped in a Tom Waits song? Be smart and learn the warning signs before it's too late. Also, it's too late. It has always been too late.
I'm haunted by a recurring vision of a skeleton flipping me off. To avoid seeing this terrifying image in bumper sticker form, I pay someone with a blank bumper to drive in front of me at all times.
There are hundreds of stories happening on the World Wide Web. Let me tell you, that's a very wide web. Our goal at Weekend Web is to bring you the latest headlines from around the Internet. We go into the very bowels of message boards everywhere and find out what millions of online citizens have to say.