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VIP Fibers Inc.

Tuesday, November 8, 2005 Update by Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka

VIP Fibers Inc., submitted by Flemmy. I guess I should consider myself odd; when my pet sheds hair all over the floor, I vacuum up and throw it out. The owner and CEO of VIP Fibers Inc., Victoria Pettigrew, turns them into clothing which she wears during highly disgusting social events.

After purchasing our first two alpacas, I started spinning for local alpaca ranchers and VIP FIBERS INC.© was borne. It wasn't until my 16 year old Lhasa Apso, Karly, passed away in 2001 and I spun her fur and knitted it into a small neck scarf that I decided to focus on pet fiber.

Yeah, that's right! Turn your dead pet into the sweater of your dreams! Transform your retarded, hairy animal into a scarf and note what colorful facial expressions people adopt after revealing it to them! Now if only there was a service that could turn my dogs' crap into jewelery.

PS: Check out this enchanting pet tribute which shows the before pictures (living dogs) and the after pictures (dead sweaters). You people are weird!

- Rich "Lowtax" Kyanka