Pathetic Inc., submitted by me.
As soon as I saw this incredible webcomic I knew that I had to thank the author by throwing as much cash his way as humanly possible. Luckily, he makes a profit by selling t-shirts featuring jokes that are right up my alley, with "dees nuts" references and the equally groundbreaking proclamation that pirates and ninjas are cool! I can not wait for the "I'm Rick James, bitch!" shirt to go on sale in seven years. It's like someone travelled a thousand years into the future and collected the absolute funniest jokes mankind had created throughout the course of that timespan, then hit his head really hard on the journey back.
Cons: causes bad nightmares. I used to have to eat beef until I passed out to have these kind of terrors, but this machine does it for me every time I fall asleep inside it.
Sorry about the blurry photo. I was lunging at my phone, yelling at it to take a clear picture. It's the only image of me that exists. I'd take another picture for you, but I'm in the middle of a rigorous trampoline session.
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