I feel really sad sometimes. I think about all the injustice in the world, and ... okay, no I don't. I worry about how I'm ever going to lose some weight, while scarfing down chocolates and playing marathon sessions of Starcraft 2. But SOME PEOPLE think about all the injustice in the world, not to mention famine, war, natural disasters and oil spills, and these things really bum them out. Well, this week, the Something Awful Forum Goons take it upon themselves to try and turn that frown upside down... but they only managed to turn it sideways into a little smirk!
Maximum Sexy Pigeon
Simply put, if I had Johnny Manziel’s physical gifts, you better believe I would be there in the Weight Room, getting to bed early, doing whatever I had to do to be the best possible athlete I could be. I wouldn't be posting on social media about sucking titties. I wouldn't even look at a titty, buddy. I'd look at a titty and see two big footballs.
A real friend doesn't move until the middle of August, ensuring temperatures in the 90s and a humidity that turns boxers into moist balls of ruined cotton.
Expendable? You must be joking.
The Comedy Goldmine examines the funniest and most creative threads from the Something Awful Forums. Although the Comedy Goldmine has changed authors many times over the years, its focus on the Something Awful Forums is still the same. Includes hilarious Photoshops, amusing work stories, parodies, and other types of oddball humor.